The topic of Predatory Sexual Assault upon children is one that many people care not to discuss. It seems that even individuals who have not experienced the trauma are still prone to its avoidance. In many different cultures children are taught to keep secrets and or feel shame about the abuse. This causes many children to grow into adulthood without ever disclosing they’ve suffered sexual abuse to anyone.
Oftentimes children suffer sexual abuse at the hands of their own family members (Intrafamilial [sic] sexual abuse). Intrafamilial sexual assault leaves lasting hurts and emotional injuries. This is due to the levels of continued psychological pain even after the abuse has stopped. Oftentimes children don’t feel that they will have the support they need so they suffer in silence.
When children are abused by adults who are supposed to protect them from harm, their ability to trust and rely on adults may be shattered.Knowing that the abuser is liked—or even loved—by other family members makes it all the more difficult for children to tell others about the abuse. (The National Child Traumatic Stress Network, n.d) http://nctsn.org/nctsn_assets/pdfs/caring/intrafamilialabuse.pdf
There is no level of empathy for child pedophiles who act on their impulses within me. Many people would offer a level of excuse for these monsters due to their apparent illnesses. I however, have a huge issue with predators (who have acted on their impulses) that live “normal lives” such as working, going to school, attending family functions, obeying laws etc. These individuals have a clear understanding of right and wrong and function as law abiding citizens. They however, ignore the rational in reference to abnormal sexual urges for their own personal gain. It is my belief that adults who are aware they have an illness (juvenile sexual preferences) also have a responsibility to protect their family members (and others) from their apparent disorder.
Family members who continue to support their child molesting loved-ones baffles me. It is difficult for me to understand how one can know his or her family member has committed a heinous act upon a child and not support the victim. I have been told numerous stories by victims whose own mothers and grandmothers refuse to believe their stories. How do we graduate from keeping secrets to educating and bringing awareness to the facts on this issue? How can we properly prepare children if we continue to burry this issues as if it doesn’t exist? When will families be ready to expose Predatory Sexual Abuse/Assault for the good of our future generations?
Secrecy, avoidance, and assumed lack of support related to this topic add to the reasons there are countless victims who refuse to disclose their stories. Consequently, victims rarely have a chance to start the process of healing and live free of past emotional injuries.
More than half of all children who are sexually abused are abused by a parent or other relative. http://nctsn.org/nctsn_assets/pdfs/caring/intrafamilialabuse.pdf
I think sometimes family member choose to deny or ignore the abusiveness of their loved ones because they’re ashamed about how it makes them look. “What did I do wrong as a mother or father that my child turned out to be a predator?” “What does it say about our family that cousin A or uncle B could do such things”. “We were raised right! I just don’t believe that someone I know and care about could do such things”. Only if they would realize 1). The criminal actions of an individual who knows right from wrong is a reflection of that individual and his/her bad choices, and 2). Accepting the truth of the situation won’t change what’s happened, but will very well stop it from happening in the future.